Anne Penders works in the field of art and museums. She tirelessly works to support inclusion for all genders in society.

My story is about an incident that happened at the airport in Eindhoven, the Netherlands. This was the summer, and I was actually going on holiday with my mother to visit my brother and his husband. They were already in France and we would reach them by the plane.

The airport and I have always had a tricky relationship. I've actually had many problems around the airport, because I've always been chosen or picked out.

I’ve always told my mom about this, that it wouldn't surprise me at all if I get to that point again... She has always been a supportive woman and well, you know, I always hope that this probably won't happen and that she’ll be there too.

So I thought, well, fine, but I kept it in the back of my mind that there's a chance I'll be picked out because I just look a little different from others.

And there, it happened, again.

I stood in line with my mother at security, the part where they put you through this very odd looking machine that scans your entire body for any potential dangerous goods you might have. Well of course before that you have to take off all your stuff and put your suitcase on the belt.

My suitcase went through security and my mother was able to walk ahead without being pulled out by the security but I was stopped the moment they got to me.

At that moment, they told me I had to open my suitcase and that they wanted to see if there was anything in there. Well, I had a pack of cards with me. They then demanded to examine those cards, because yes maybe there might be drug traces or something on them.

I've had to deal with these situations before, so for me there is always the thought at the back of my mind that they will pull me to a side during security check. I’m not sure if its because they have certain guidelines for security or is it just because I look different. Or perhaps they are just looking for a certain profile of someone who is very similar to me, or it is another piece of discrimination and I find it very overwhelming.

I find it quite difficult that I will never really get the answer to that, but I am always working to try to understand why.

Not just in airports, but also in stores it's the same. In addition, I was also kicked out when I tried voting because they thought it wasn’t me, that I was either a refugee or a foreigner who couldn't vote.

So yes, I do find that annoying and that's actually something I should always be aware of from now on until I die, because apparently it still exists and my friends also suffer from it.

It was also quite a bit of a trudge for my mother that I was taken out and yes she was also quite frustrated with this situation. But yeah, what are you going to do?

You're just not 100% sure why you're being taken out, so that's always really, really tricky. So what do you think? These situations can change you after you experience it. Or do you think it is the person who has this who is really inflicting the damage?

My advice

I don't necessarily think I can change it myself. I think the only thing I and others can advise is that yes, if you do have a color or if you deviate from a standard, then you always take into account that you can be picked out.

I mean, you can pretend to close your eyes that it ain't happening, But it just happens and it’s up to us to either leave it that way, or to tell your story and don't get angry immediately if you do get picked out. You can never be 100% sure why someone will want you off the plane or anywhere else.

Just stay positive and take into account that discrimination and racism are still strongly present for now.

Keep calm and share your story.